ATTENTION, SOLDIER!

• WHEN YOUR GUT GOES ROGUE, you need someone with you in the trenches, and Witty Yeti has your back, soldier. We’re ready to fight dirty, even if your underwear isn’t.
• CLEAN UP YOUR BOWELS' DISHONORABLE DISCHARGE. Our tactical reinforcement pack has you covered with 10 Butt Wipes, Disposable Underwear, Tissue Pack, Wood Scraper, Biohazard Bag, and Metal Pin to commemorate your trauma.
• GUARANTEED FOR LIFE, though we can’t warrant your dignity. We offer a No-Nonsense Lifetime Satisfaction Guarantee so if at any point you're not 100% happy, just send us an email, and we promise to make it right (your pants are a lost cause, though).
• THE PERFECT GIFT FOR INTESTINAL INSURRECTION. Give the gift of preparedness to anyone who's ever gambled on a fart and lost. When their belly betrays them in enemy territory, they'll remember who had their back (and rear) when it mattered most.
• SILENT BUT DEADLY WENT LOUD AND PROUD. Sometimes the element of surprise works against you - like when that "silent" becomes a trumpet solo. This survival kit delivers immediate crisis management when your belly's classified intel goes public.

Is this actually a real product?

While the humor is premium grade, so are the supplies.

You get 1x pair of disposable underwear, 10x heavy-doody wet wipes, 10x cleanup tissues, 1x commemorative pin, 1x biohazard bag, 1x collectible tin, and 1x emergency wooden scraper.

You're welcome.